Architecture Analysis

Since I have come back to Encyclophobaticsburg, I will give you viewers insight on the marvelous Places here in Encyclophobaticsburg. I will call this segment Architecture Analysis, and I am also working on a map of Encyclophobaticsburg to show you all.

The Local Fruit Shop

Here in Encyclophobaticsburg, fruit plays an important part of the city. Very close to my HQ is a shop that sells fruit. A lot of fruit. The shop has entire rooms devoted to pears, apples, Yodelberries (They even sell the stew), and grapes. It covers 14 city blocks, and has to index its cash registers because there are so many. Most of the building is made out of clay, however, the current owner has been doing some remodeling, and one wall is studded with diamonds every 2 feet. Unfortunately, these diamonds seem to mysteriously disappear when nobody is looking, and it is slightly expensive to keep replacing him, although the shop's revenue could afford to remodel the entire city with diamonds if they chose to. In fact, they were about to (to most of the city's chagrin), but an election was occurring and one of the candidates, wuite close to winning, said he would prevent that is he got into office. The next day, there were so many votes for him that the voting office's floor broke. He immediately passed a law that prevented "Any person or persons from remodeling the city using diamonds spaced anywhere from 1 inch to 19 feet apart if they were funded from the revenue of a fruit shop". While this discouraged any further planning of the remodeling, one group of workers did attempt to convince some lizards to do the job to avoid the "person or persons" part. Luckily, the lizards misunderstood and started eating the diamonds, costing the fruit shop many millions. Although it is a source of pride for us in Encyclophobaticsburg, the fruit shop has also caused a war, known as the Great Food Pyramid War of 1983. When the government was deciding on a new food pyramid design, the fruit shop sent several agents to try and enlarge the fruit section so people would buy more fruit. THe government began to send police forces in, but since the fruit shop was not only richer but also more powerful than the government, they held their own. Fortunately, the war was mainly fought with celery sticks (let's just say there were a lot of manufacturing mix-ups), so no-one was hurt.

So now that you know about our mighty fruit store, you will undoubtedly be inspired to throw melons out the window. Good Day.

At Last!

At Last! I have returned to Encyclophobaticsburg! I am so very sorry for not posting all of this time. Unfortunately, I was on a 5 day cruise, which turned out to be a lot longer because... well let's just say there was a series of unlikely events that contributed to my absence. I will try to keep posting, and fix this blog up a bit. I might even tell you guys what happened on my cruise.

The rare newtatooies of Encyclophobaticsburg

As many of you know, Encyclophobaticsburg is a flourishing country. Just recently, a very exciting and amazing discovery was discovered (hence the fact that it was a discovery). A new species, called the newtatooie, was found roaming a pond. Newtatooies are large, aquatic insects shaped like donuts. They move forward by spiraling rapidly. The result is that water rushes through the hole in the middle, and off they go. Without newtatooies, the entire ecosystem would collapse, as they serve a crucial role - that of swimming. If no animals swam, there would be no swimming, and that would surely be bad for some reason.

Yes.

This blog is about to enter hibernation

As all true ecologists know, all things come and go. This blog has definitely seen better times. I have recently been abducted by aliens, and as such it is difficult to post. Anyway, the alien race has been imposing a type of torture used to force people into submision... I think they call it krowemoh... I don't know, because it's in a language they call sdrawkcab. But the point is, it's very effective, and I am usually doing that instead. So, unfortunately, I will be unable to update this blog for long periods at a time... Meaning that I am forced to announce a slight hibernation period... I do not know how long it will last, but I am suspecting until June sometime... possibly longer if they encounter snow, because their spacecraft cannot travel during snowy weather and I may be free to update. I'm sorry, but expect sparse posting.

*Exasperated Sigh*

Ahhh. I am sorry about this problematic approach to problems, but there appears to be an error. As you can possibly tell, this lonely blog out in the cold realms of the internet has suffered from an internal systematic lack of posts, and therefore feels rundown.

The Solution:

Renovations! Elaborations! Limeade!

The Renovatons, Elaborations, and Limeade:

just expect not very much posting for a while, since I have recently joined a group that seems to have quite a lot of work attached to it, work that I have to do in the time I could be writing about bunny slippers and lemons. So remember, I don't like it, but there is some troubles. Hopefully, I can come back to at least weekly, maybe even once-every-two-days-ly! Oh, and expect a makeover, so it might be closed from... time to time (evil laugh).

and now, a small story about flying discs:

There once was a flying disc. His name was Frisbee. The end.

Sorry about the anti-posting, I was attacked by air

No really! I was just walking along, minding my own business, when a particularly bad-tempered bit of air came too close and I fell into a green dumpster. Dumb ive45swvh mbu8jkjm,ml

Watch out for the puddle, it is wet

Yesterday, I encountered a very rare phenomenon. It was... a puddle! My first reaction was to inspect the puddle for evidence about a number of missing tomatoes in the area, but I decided that some things (such as puddles, rakes, and angry gophers) are best left alone. Sadly, I continued walking, until I came across another puddle. This time, I became immediately suspicious. How come there were so many puddles? What was the meaning of that plastic spoon hanging in that shop window? It was overwhelmingly blue, and I had to escape it! Let me tell you a bit of advice. Next time that you are equipping a custom made jet pack, don't let the clerk offer you the special "Confusi-Cord opening mechanism". It's supposedly made to confuse enemies who steal your jet pack, and make it hard for them to open, but pulling a cord, playing Twinkle, Twinkle, little star on a trumpet, Typing in a code on a keypad, and trying to hold down the activation button all at the same time isn't any easier while running from a spoon (especially beacause it was more hopping from a spoon, seeing as to that I was trying to type in the number with one foot). Finally, I opened my jet pack, and blasted away from the evil spoon. Sadly, I fell asleep right after that, because I was extremely tired from opening it. When I woke up... well, that's a different story.

Barometers.

Only tonight (and tommorrow) you can buy this fabulous product from Pizza Industries Useless Junk Department!

I don't think that is such a good idea...

"Why not?" asked Chester.
"Look at the sign! Walking through that tree would be really bad!"
"No! I like muffins!"

And so it was...