Saturday, May 16, 2009

Yodelberry stew.

Today, I will tell you how to make Yodelberry stew.

Yodel Berries are a very rare type of berry grown in the mountainous regions of the Sahara desert. Just kidding; They grow mainly in the Alps, particularly in canyons or near caves. They are white, to blend in with the snow, and prefer cold climates. Though the fruit itself is encased in a hard shell, the leaves can be used to make tea (though I wouldn't recommend it, since the tea is bitter and has a tendency to explode violently at infrequent intervals.) The shell responds to loud noises, so yodeling near some will cause the shell to fall off, thus the name yodel berry. The fruit inside is very sweet, but before it can be eaten, you must peel off the outer skin, which is as bitter as the leaves, and then take off the seeds that coat it (they are very sticky, and are hard to get off the berry, but even harder to get off your hand). After you have finally located one in the snow, yodeled near it, peeled off the two layers of skin, and taken off the many seeds, you are left with a small fruit about half the size of a blueberry. The original shell, in comparison, was 7 times larger than that little thing you are holding.

So you ask "what's the point? If they are so hard to get, why not just make regular stew?". If you asked that, then you have a good point. But here is the answer:


Why in the world would you go to all that trouble, if the stew calls for 150 of those little things in one serving, AND the stew itself tastes really bad, has absolutely NO essential vitamins, AND is not filling in the slightest?

1 comment:

Freddie McNickels said...

I tried to make yodelberry stew, and went home to serve it to my pet hamster, but discovered that three years had passed, my hamster had ran away and my home had started leaking and now smelled of mildew and moldy hamster food.