Friday, April 24, 2009

Ice and pencils...

Sorry for not posting for so long about what happens after the post where I told you what happened when I had been sorry for being gone so long. Basically, It had been my own tracks in the snow( I think someone must have placed them there, I never would have made that mistake!) Anyway, the culprit was a actually a small Woodland Muskrat, who had been working for an unknown employer, but felt bad about his crime, and came to me to confess. The reason it took so long to post on the matter was because the Muskrat never said more than two words before falling asleep for 12 hours. It was hard to talk to him.

Sorry, Bye.

Monday, April 20, 2009


Please observe:


With an 87.5% accuracy rating, the monkey that typed that is pretty good. This giraffe, however...


As you can see, this 12.5% approval rating is rather low. The Giraffe, though horrible at spelling, Has a ph. D in Math, Works at NASA, Scored an IQ of 3,984.8, and won the Brazilian Math contest 40 times in a row. So, Ya...

Sunday, April 12, 2009


HI! I am very sorry for not blogging this long. I was hired by the Encyclophobaticsburg government to find something that had gone missing from the Encyclophobaticsburg museum. To make up for the long wait, I will tell you what happened.

It all started when I recieved a call that The government suspected that a theif may try to steal something from the Gerbil Factory. I rushed over there and started patrolling the area. After a few minutes my mind wandered to the phone call. Suddenly, I realized that not only is there no government in Encyclophobaticsburg, but over 86.95% of it's citizens do not even know the definition of the word! I hopped in my private jet and flew to the museum, but I was too late. The door was ajar, and on further investigation, I found out that the most famous item in the museum had been stolen: The golden donut.

The donut was the only remaining part of the great donut temple. When the great founders Phidellys built Encyclophobaticsburg, they made a large Donut temple in the center of it. Sadly, the temple was soon demolished by a herd of vaccuum cleaners, and only the large solid-gold donut statue remained. 

Anyway, enough history. I inspected the area for clues, and found only three items: a rubber chicken, a shoe, and a note with several fingerprints on it and some words saying: 

"I have stolen the greatest piece of Encyclophobaticsburg history.  P.S. my secret base is not in the little shack off of Cheesecake lane and to the right a bit."

 This narrowed the search down a bit. I needed to figure out who had stolen it,  and where he or she was. I now knew that the secret base wasn't in the little shack off of Cheesecake lane and to the right a bit. I used some silly putty to pick up the fingerprints, then tore up the note so that  the thief couldn't come back and change it.

When I got back to my HQ, I took out the silly putty and realized that the fingerprints had been ruined when I put the silly putty in it's case (you're supposed to do that to keep it from drying out). I then realized that I had torn up the note, So I couldn't get them again. Hmmm... This would be only a slight setback.

Next, I took the rubber chicken in for questioning. It refused to reveal information, even when I threatened to loose a stuffed racoon on it.

My only hope was the shoe. It was just a brown leather shoe, slightly worn, with one of the laces missing. Nothing there. I was out of clues. Tired, I fell asleep instantly. No, really, I mean I fell asleep standing up in my lab. When I woke up, I realized something was very strange. Looking around, I realized that nothing was out of place. I still had a suspicious feeling, though. I walked out into my living room, and into the kitchen, bedroom, and den before finally going through the fake tapestry that leads to my outside office. this is the one I greet customers in. Even the Lobby outside was normal. I opened the door to go outside, and realized what was wrong. Instead of the brick lane that led to the more busy part of town, I was greeted by a glacier. After investigating, I determined that a small portion of Enyclophobaticsburg had frozen over. I found some snow, and discovered two sets of bootprints. Taking pictures, I went back to the lab. There, I matched one set with the boot. The other set presented a mystery. Who was working for the owner of the boot?

Come back soon to find out more!